you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
