the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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