I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
