hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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