I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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