kristin has been a bad kristin
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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