apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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