she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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