She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
