i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
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As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
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Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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