So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
