haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Randomize
