I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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