oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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