she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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