Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'm at about main and main street
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
It's shark week go big or go home
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
