My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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