I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
whose parrot is this?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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