When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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