She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Pants are for mortals
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
