I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Maybe he injected his testicle?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize
