I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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