Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
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