You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Send help, water and tortillas.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize