Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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