Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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