I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
