I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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