Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
