I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
