are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
