...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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