I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Randomize
