Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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