it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
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