I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
