So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
