I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize