Sry I called you an 8
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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