So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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