p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I need to calm my uterus...
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