I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
