So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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