fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
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