I'm jealous of your bromance
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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