we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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