Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
ttyl tear gas
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
