with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
