i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
My cat gives me a boner
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
