I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
