i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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